Spring Cleaning my Brain

I am easily bored.

Never held back from what I want to do.

Some might go as far as to call it being stubborn. 

Contained but impetuous.

I can't paint my nails because I can't sit still for long enough to let one coat dry.

I don't like folding laundry because I don't like routine. I would rather buy new dishes than wash the old ones. 

Maybe I'm just in need of someone to grab my shoulders and give me a shake and tell me whats normal and why I should do it.

I struggle with normality.

Sometimes I brush my teeth for 7 minutes because that feels normal. 

Some nights I put my pillow on the opposite end of the bed in hopes that I'll wake up differently. I never do.

When I carry a purse, I have gum in it - Only gum.

Sometimes I forget I'm reading in the middle of the page. Instead I'm shocked that we would rather make paper out of our oxygen source. Priorities. 

I think a lot about people who prioritize matching their socks in the morning. As if that defines their character. 

I think a lot about people who sit at a desk all day, return to their house that they have never called home, and spend another night alone in their cold bed having another Netflix date with their TV dinner. 

I wonder if they feel like they are missing something.

I wonder if they think money will make them happy?

Maybe I'm just going through a phase, like a 4 year old asking the world "why" they do things the way that they do.

Maybe things just shouldn't be questioned.

I just feel flat. Not flat like calm water, but deflated like a balloon.

So there lies more questions: Am I all out of air, or all out of breath?